i hate men

i hate men

Women Will Understand This! Men Should Memorize It!

Every women know that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth, and he takes his life in his hands!

This is a handy communication guide that should be as common as a driver’s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

Dangerous:

  • What’s for dinner?
  • Are you wearing that?
  • Why are you so worked up?
  • Should you be eating that?
  • What did you DO all day?

Safer:

  • Can I help you with dinner?
  • Wow, you sure look good in brown!
  • Could we be overreacting?
  • There are a lot of apples left.
  • I hope you didn’t over-do it today.

Safest:

  • Where would you like to go for dinner?
  • Wow! Look at you!
  • Here’s my paycheck.
  • Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
  • I’ve always loved you in that robe!

Ultra Safe:

  • Here, have some wine.
  • Here, have some wine.
  • Here, have some wine.
  • Here, have some wine.
  • Here, have some wine.

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Post meta

This entry was written by Riley and posted on April 3, 2008 at 9:19 am and filed under 'All About Men' Jokes, I Hate Men. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post. Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.

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2 Comments so far (Add 1 more)

  1. times of the month wtf? no wonder you hate men

    i hate them too but
    buy a new cliche

    1. you on June 8th, 2008 at 11:35 pm

  2. Let’s see what I learned:

    1: Where would you like to go for dinner?
    Lesson: That what adults ask kids, usually followed by a boisterous “Chuckie Cheese!” You’re a child.

    2: Wow! Look at you!
    Lesson: You’re ugly and know it. Possibly fat and ugly.

    3: Here’s my paycheck.
    Lesson: You’re a prostitute.

    4: Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
    Lesson: Yep, you’re fat.

    5: I’ve always loved you in that robe!
    Lesson: You got fat because you lay around eating in your bedclothes. You’re lazy.

    6: Here, have some wine. Here, have some wine. Here, have some wine. Here, have some wine. Here, have some wine.
    Lesson: You’re a drunk.

    You’re a childish, ugly, fat, lazy, drunken whore. Thanks for the insight into your “psyche.”

    2. Einstein Jackson on April 8th, 2008 at 5:49 am

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