I HATE MEN

I have learned a great lesson recently. All the physical characteristics I thought I hated about men were just person specific…it is the person and personality, not their physical characteristics that make me like or dislike a man. Attraction is only one part of what is needed to make a relationship work.

We all have pet peeves or so called things that we hate about men…such as a bald head, hairy chest, back hair, bad breath, a big nose, bad teeth…the list goes on. I have my own annoyances as well, and they are often the excuse I use when I break-off a short term relationship. I find a new guy, I date him for a few weeks or less, and then I just stop seeing him because I don’t like him.

My mom ask me why did I break up with so and so, he was “so nice”. I say because I didn’t like him, and she ask “why?” so I pick one of the notorious characteristics, such as “his chest was hairy,” but really I don’t mind a hairy chest on a man I like.

There was really so many things about so and so, that bothered me…it was just easier to say that instead of hurting his feelings.

Is it better to simplify the breakup, or should I totally pick the guy apart and tell him exactly how I feel to his face, and possible hurt his self esteem? I mean I wasn’t in love with him or anything like that, I just didn’t like him.

Maybe it is better to be completely honest the first time that they do something you don’t like. Should I have told him blatantly that I can’t stand that he listens to Guns N’ Roses 24-7, and I need to listen to something else or it is over. If we do things like this are we automatically labeled a bitch or in my case maybe a picky bitch?

What ever happen to telling someone exactly how you feel? Have I gotten so caught up with not wanting to hurt feelings, that I simply choose not to bombard them with everything that bothers me?

I guess it comes down to personal opinion, I may not like it, but it is just my opinion. I mean, it is not against the law to idealize Axel Rose, I just think it is really weird.

The better question is after a few weeks of dating, do I really know this guy enough to tear him to shreds…usually I do not. So this is probably why I don’t tell him all the stuff, and instead I just just tell him I don’t like him or I’m not ready for a relationship, when I really am, or I pick one mild problem that “really” bothers me versus telling him:

I hate your hair, your gut is huge for your age, no one listens to GNR anymore, you suck in bed, your nose is huge, your eyes creep me out, you are dull and boring and have no personality, you are cheap, you are obsessed with a car that is a piece of Japanese junk and it does not look like a spaceship, you eat too much and you do not eat healthy at all for being a supposed health freak, for lifting weights everyday I can’t tell, I don’t like your teeth, you’re a sloppy kisser, you don’t take care of your finger nails and your toe nails are gross, and it is so freakin’ weird that you have a poster size picture of yourself on your bedroom wall…didn’t you ever hear of Jenny McCarthy?

If I told him all this would he change at all or just call me a bitch? I mean is it my place to tell him what I think is wrong with him…maybe some girl might like him for who he is?

I guess what I’m trying to say is that all the things we say we hate about men, might just be what we hate about a certain man, and not men in general.

Be open minded and you might find love in a not so likely place, or with an unlikely prospect.