If you want to hear my situation…here goes:

My best friend and I have been having various arguments about little stuff that escalated into larger issues.  She recently has been seeing someone serious for about 2 months…“I know I know.  Not a long time at all.  My point exactly.” Anyways, she calls me up at least twice a week asking when we can get together and go out to have some fun.  I always let her know what is going on and my plans her words are this…”call me as soon as you get there and I’ll come over.” And I do.  The problem here is every time I call with plans she makes up an excuse. “Oh I’m dirty.” “He (the boyfriend) won’t want me to go.” or my favorite no response until the next day where she then says, “I didn’t hear my phone.” or “There was no reception.”

The problem I have is, “Why bother calling me and asking to hang out if every time an excuse has to be made?” The situation itself is crappy to be in, but it really is upsetting to me that we were “best” friends.  Out of all her “best” friends I was the ONLY one who showed up to her college graduation.  The ONLY one who showed up for her graduation dinner.  The ONLY one who wanted her to get together with her current boyfriend.  And the ONLY one who drove and hour and half to a party where I knew no one.

Last night, I called to see how her first day at her new job since she graduated went.

ring. ring. ring. ring. ring. voicemail.

Do you want to know the best part about that?  I knew for a fact that her boyfriend was on his way over to her house and she must have avoided my call.  “Doesn’t that sound crazy?” I left her message telling her exactly how I felt.  Her boyfriend called one of my friends and got on the subject of his girlfriend and our “fighting.”  He wanted to know why I wanted them to break up?  My friend said, “What are you talking about? She was the only one that thought you two would make a good couple.” He then went on to say well then why does she keep telling me that she wants her to go out without me.  My friend told him, “Listen, she calls her wanting to go out for a girls night and then breaks the plans at the last minute with stupid excuses because of you.”

Apparently, my “best” friend has gotten herself in a web of lies.  This morning I got a text message from my best and it said…”Work was great.  We should get pedicures this week.”  I couldn’t believe she didn’t listen to my message that I left her on voicemail because if she had I guarantee the text would have been a bit different.

to be continued…

Now, back home there is this guy who likes me and we’ve gone out on a few dates…he calls me, leaves me messages that say, “sweetie” and “honey,” which by the way kind of freak me out because we’ve only been on a few dates and the tone of his voice when he says those terms of endearment sound serious. Before I left for my trip this guy told me that he was really going to miss me.

Getting back to the Ocean City trip. The morning after we arrived we got up and got ready to go to the beach. As my phone rang. It was the guy back home. He called to tell me that all his friends were asking about me and wanted to know how the two of us were doing. Now, this guy is extremely nice…and maybe even too nice for me? (I’ll get back to that later.) I was shocked that his friends think that we are a “couple.” If you have read anything else that I have written…maybe it’s true that I could possibly still be on the rebound? I recently broke up with my ex, who I was with for 3 1/2 years. After he told me about his friends I told him that I had to go and get ready for the beach. He politely said, “No problem honey. Call me whenever you have a minute.”

For that moment I thought to myself, “what am I doing? what’s wrong with me? this guy would treat me great, but something is holding me back.” I let my thoughts drift off and enjoyed myself in the sun on the beach. After a few hours we went back to the house, got dressed for the night and went out to dinner. By the way if anyone is thinking about going to the beach, drinks are expensive! After dinner we walked on the boardwalk and came upon a bar called the, “Purple Moose” this is where the trip got interesting.

I walked in before my friend while they were checking her ID and looked around as I hear someone say, “what can I get you?” I turned around and saw the cutest bartender standing there with a smile on his face. I ordered their famous Pina Colada. He then said, “there are two seats over there.” So my friend and I walked over and sat down. As the night went on, the bartender would ask questions towards me in a flirtatious way. At first I thought he was being friendly like he was to other women in the bar, but then he introduced himself started to tell me that he was originally from an area close to where I’m from. He went on to ask where we were going the next night. At that time our plan was “Seacrets.” He was trying to convince us both to come back tomorrow night and that we would have more fun.

When we were about to leave he gave me my check…with a pen? I thought hmmm, I’m paying cash and he knew that…what’s the deal with the pen. He didn’t ask me for my number so I didn’t give it to him. We left and went back to the house.

The next night we ended up back at the Purple Moose. The bartender was completely shocked and with a huge smile and laughed, “I didn’t think I was ever going to see you again.” I laughed and smiled. During the night my friend walked away to the ladies room and the bartender came up to me and said, “So, you didn’t leave me your number last night?” My response was, “you didn’t ask?” He smiled and went to wait on customers. We were there dancing and having fun until 2 am. My friend told me that the one time I went to the restroom she wrote down my cell number and gave it to him and he put it right into his phone. We danced and had a good time until about 2 am. At 2 am my friend and I went up to the bar to get the tab. This bill was completely shy to what it should have been and at the bottom it had his phone number. As we were leaving he asked me if he could call me…I said, “absolutely.” Don’t forget that this bartender was not only hot, but seemed very sweet.

The next morning I woke up very slowly - due to the night before…ha. He called me and asked if I wanted to go on the boardwalk. What I really wanted to do was go on the beach and enjoy my last day in the sun - and that’s what I went on to tell him. Back to my friend. I told her that she could come with me. She was quick to respond, “NO.” She got mad that I would think about meeting up with someone I just met. At first I thought, “yea maybe I shouldn’t go?” But then I thought life is what you make of it and I was very attracted to this bartender and he seemed very nice…so I went anyways after we were verbally attacking each other.

Now we were on 25th street and he was on 6th so we were going to meet in the middle. I quickly got on with my other best friend who was back at home to tell her about the fight I just got in with the girl I was visiting with. I probably shouldn’t have even called her because we were having a fight for a while about stupid issues that would take me forever to explain, at least right now. Anyways, I was telling her about the entire situation with this guy that I met bar tending the past two nights. She brought up the guy from back home in the conversation. She went on to say these exact words, “You know what, you don’t even deserve a nice guy like that.” I couldn’t believe that she would say something like that completely out of spite. I know it was out of spite because of our ongoing fight we’ve been having. I told her that I’ve been so confused with men and that maybe I was still on the rebound. She then said, “Get off your high horse. You aren’t on the rebound.”

At that moment I felt as if I had no friends who cared about me. I felt like no one could possibly try to understand me. I got off the phone with her and told her that I wished her luck with her new job and not to worry about me even if she would and hung up. I called Nick (bartender), whom by the way met me on 12th street. We sat there and talked for a while about everything. While we were talking I didn’t hear my cell phone at all. 3 hours past before I looked at my phone. 2 voicemails, 3 text messages, and 6 missed calls…all from the same person, my friend who I was staying with. I quickly called her and said I would be at the house in 5 minutes. Nick called up his friend for me and we hopped in his car and he dropped me off. I actually beat her there. She walked into the house said nothing except, “as soon as I get out of the shower we can go.” Now, we were planning on leaving around that time anyways, but the tone of her voice was not what I expected.

Needless to say we got into the car in an uncomfortable situation. I felt bad, she was mad, and we had 4 hours together in a car. Overall the entire trip was quiet. Things got better the longer we were in the car together. We avoided everything that had to do with that weekend and the beach. When we pulled up to my place things were all better. We made plans for the week already and the upcoming weekend.

Overall, I would say that even though we got in a fight I was glad I took the risk to meet a great guy. Nick told me to visit anytime and wished that I hadn’t been leaving so shortly. My friend and I made plans to take a trip down at the end of July, lets just hope that there on no fights!

In regards to my other “best friend” I don’t think I’ll be taking time out of my day to call her and see how she is. When I told my other friend about my weekend and what my friend told me about being on the “rebound” she said it was false. She said it took her 3 years to get over her ex and I may very well be just looking around? I wish I knew if my feelings towards guys right now were what I truly feel or just “rebounds?”

Like many women I am a huge planner. I love to know what’s going on - when, where, why…etc. My love life is the only thing that I don’t feel I have under control. It’s funny because as much as I feel alone sometimes I’m never alone. Problems I have been dealing with lately are my guy friends wanting more from me…more than just “friends.” I hate hurting anyone’s feelings, but I certainly don’t want anyone taking my friendship for granted.

There is a guy who I was seeing, and when I say was I mean our so called “friendship” will most likely be ending relatively shortly. Not to sound like every woman in America, but the problem really is him this time. The personality is good, but his overall demeanor is shall I say, “immature.” I’m a senior in college and ready to be independent. I don’t even think this guy is ready to do his own laundry, let alone move out of his parents house. He also has so - called commitment issues? and at the age of 20 never had a serious relationship?

So, when I saw that their was a blog out there about “hating men” I decided to check it out. I, just like the owner of this blog don’t hate men at all, in fact, “I wish I could find the right man.” My best friend just got into a serious relationship with a guy who we both went to school with and even though the guy she is seeing I personally don’t think is “right” for her, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t extremely happy for her. She too had her fair share of “losers” in the past.

I tell my close friends about all my experiences I have dating and most times they say, “when the right guy comes along you will know.” I just wish I knew when? I’m the kind of person who is very independent. When I know what I want I will do everything I can to get it. Sometimes in the past that has been my downfall, so now I am just going to let the pieces fall as they may and hope for the best. In the meantime I will enjoy spending time with my family and friends.

He doesn’t tell me how he feels…what am I suppose to do. I just want to make a well-informed decision. If I don’t know what he wants or feels, it will not be fair to him. We were in this together…his opinion, wants, desires all matter to me. Just like I enjoy putting his body at peace, I want to put his heart at peace. I can’t exactly explain how he makes me feel. Without words, his touch, tenderness, passion, and warmth make me so comfortable. I never want to leave his arms. I could only image his words, but they are never spoken.

I gave him an ultimatum…and I really don’t like doing that, but I didn’t know what else to do. I asked him to tell me how he feels or what he wants…his stock answer is “I don’t know.” I seriously wanted to pull my hair out. So I told him, if he doesn’t give me his decision, then I am making the decision for us, and he might not like it.

I told him I can’t do this anymore. I want to be with him, but that is not what we have now. I can’t do the friends with benefits because there are too many feelings involved, so I’d rather just be friends and nothing more. He said he is going to leave me alone for a while…and I am hoping that is what is best for both of us.

I did so good when I talked to him last night…I didn’t even cry until I asked him what was his favorite thing about me…he said, “Physical?” and I said, “no”. He told me, “I have so many favorite things about you…” This is when my eyes started to tear up…then he said he liked how I am always so nice to him…it wasn’t that he was just saying it, I felt it with all my heart that he truly meant it. This is also where I get confused…he likes me because I am so nice to him, but he can like me as “just a friend” because I am so nice to him. My niceness is not exclusive to relationships, ask any of my friends…I am just genuinely nice. So which is it?

I wanted to ask him if he knew that he was taking a chance of losing me forever, possibly losing the chance to be anything more than friends…I wondered if that is a chance that he is willing to take? He said he doesn’t want to string me along, and I won’t let myself be strung along anymore. I wanted to tell him that I think a part of me will always love him (words that I never spoke to him)…if I would have told him I loved him would that have made a difference?

I felt like we had this almost perfect relationship…the biggest problem, maybe the only problem is that he didn’t share his feelings with me. I started to feel like he didn’t want to share his life with me… I don’t want him to regret not speaking his heart to me. It reminds me of one of my past relationships…I got a phone call from my ex about a month ago to talk to me and tells me of his regrets, that he wished he would have told me certain things, and if he did tell me maybe we would still be together, and that maybe all the bad that happen between us would not have happen. My ex asked me… if he told me now, what he had wanted to say when we were together, would it make a difference now? My answer was NO…he waited years (literally years). I told my ex that I think I am in love with someone else. I know my ex was upset, but what does he want me to do now.

“Remember you can’t turn back time, and sometimes you only have one more chance to make it right. Just follow your heart.”

About three or four weeks after our “hooking up” he came up to me telling me that he really liked me and could see himself falling in love with me. And that he would love me like no one has ever loved anyone before. He started to tear up and walk away after I politely told him as I had told him time and time again that all I felt was a friendship. The next day I was have a girly day at the mall with my best friend and her boyfriend who is really good friends with the guy I hooked up with and told her something that I needed to know.

My initial reaction was fear of course because I had no idea of what news I was going to hear. My best friend told me that the number that I was told was way off…28 people he slept with turned into 62!

At that moment I felt sick to my stomach, tears filling my eyes, and complete betrayal. I thought to myself, “Could someone be that disrespectful?” At that moment I walked out of the store I was shopping in picked up my cell phone called the guys phone and left an assertive message telling him he needed to call me back. My friend and I hopped in my car as my cell phone rang. I sat in the driver’s seat parked in the lot infuriated and completely torn apart.

The first thing I said was, “ You lied to me about how many women you slept with.” The next thing he said is where I completely lost it when he said, “Now you know what it feels like to be hurt.” I could not believe someone would be so ignorant enough to say that, especially someone who the night before spilled all their feelings to me. I told him that how I hurt him and how he hurt me are irrelevant. His whole demeanor over the phone was cocky and proud of his track recorded. He even had the nerve to say to me, “what is the difference between what I told you and what it really is?” I yelled, “34!”

My best friend and I switched seats and she drove my car home. She called her boyfriend and told her everything that happened and his reaction was, “Love hurts.” At that point I felt all men are pigs even though it’s not all, but at the time I was hurt so badly. Later that night around 11:00pm my cell rang. I look at the caller ID and it was the jerk. I couldn’t believe it, I didn’t want to have anything to do with him, but I answered.

I said, “Hello?” He responded with the same and said that he regrets a lot of things in life, but doesn’t regret what him and I had. I told him that, “ I was just another check on your list and you happened to fall for me to your surprise and now you feel like an idiot and that the apology meant nothing.” He then had the courage to yell at me and say he didn’t have to defend what he did. My response was, “I’m not the one who called, I didn’t even want to hear your voice again.”

The arguing continued for a little while, then I got sick of it and did not have to put up with it. I told him I had to get up early for work and didn’t need to get upset again before I go to sleep. So ladies and gentlemen when you think someone is being honest and genuine think twice you could get hurt.

So he calls me the next day…I thought twice about answering, but I did really want to see him again to talk to him about why he lied. I listened to him talk on the phone, but I didn’t say a lot back…I was still upset, but I made sure to let him know that his movies were at my house. We spoke briefly over the next few days, but I had a busy weekend so I did not have anytime to see him.

I guess it was either the following Sunday or Monday night that he came over. I made dinner for us, and we sat and ate. After dinner I finally brought it up…”So what was up with you the other night…I know you were probably half asleep, I just don’t understand why you lied.” He told me he didn’t know why he lied, it was one of his old ex’s calling him, he didn’t even give her his new number, she got it off of a mutual acquaintance. Apparently she calls him when she is drunk, which explains the 1:30am phone call. I felt so much better once he told me. I know he does not like her anymore…I know that she caused a lot of drama for him in the past and their relationship ended very rocky…we’ll leave it at that.

Once we talked I felt soooo much better. I do really like him, and I would not want to stop talking to him over something so stupid. Now, he knows how much that upset me and I think it made him understand how much I care about him…if he didn’t know already.

The last few times we have spent together after our talk, he has been very affectionate, kind, and passionate…ceratinly acting as more than just friends, but I don’t want to push him to make a decision when he is not ready. I am willing to wait for him because I do like him so much. I have technically been single for the last 3 years (I’ve only went out on a few date, and didn’t like any of them enough to start a relationship) So after 3 years of being single I’ve finally found a guy that I want to have a relationship with… I’m not in a hurry to find another guy, or anything like that.

The confusion has subsided, and I don’t feel like I am spinning in circles anymore. I don’t think that he is afraid of me, but I do think, well I know, that he is scared… Scared of getting hurt, and scared of hurting me. I am scared too, but I think I am going to take the advice of Erin??????,

“Take a risk on the unexpected it might just be what you’re looking for…”

All of this makes me think of what Winston Churchill once said,

“You will make all kinds of mistakes; but as long as you are generous and true and also fierce you cannot hurt the world or even seriously distress her. She was meant to be wooed and won by youth.”

While I’m sure Mr. Churchill never thought that these words of wisdom could be applied to a relationship, it fits very well. Why not take the risk, and conquer the fear of the unknown. Sure we may make mistakes along the way, but imagine all that we would have missed or not achieved if we didn’t take the risk. Is there a possibility that one or both of us could end up getting hurt? Absolutely. But, we both could be passing up a chance for true happiness.

On the path to true happiness I expect to fall a few times, but I will always get back up.

So, as soon as I was single there was the usual “rebound.” I think it was more that I was afraid of being alone than anything. Then I realized that I would be fine living the single life until I found someone. Weeks went by and I met a guy.

Now, this guy was five years older, which isn’t a big deal, technically married, and had a girlfriend. Yes, ladies and gentlemen what in the world was I thinking?? We ended up hooking up while he was still with his girlfriend. And he made it clear that all he wanted was to “hook-up,” even though he kept telling me how much he liked me, better than his girlfriend, which I am NOT ok with.

While we “hooked-up” all I could think about was, “is this gonna go anywhere?” Then of course the thought of his poor girlfriend did cross my mind. That too was another reason why I wouldn’t want to see myself with him - once a cheater always a cheater. Who’s to say he would not cheat again? Most likely he would.

So I got over it and decided to move on and forget guys for awhile. Too much of this drama was driving my crazy. I went to a party with my friend and very unexpectantly met a great guy!

We ended up talking for hours and hit things off right away. Later I had found out that the other guy (the one with the gf) dumped his girlfriend for me.

He was telling me over the phone how he could now give me 100% and see where things could go and that he really cared about me. I was so confused because this guy is completely opposite from me. I’m 21 he’s 26. I’m more conservative and laid back he’s the bad boy type.

I couldn’t truly understand what he was doing? He was saying all the right things to try and trick me into thinking he was some awesome guy. And don’t get me wrong he is a nice guy and good friend, but not my type of guy to be in a long-term relationship with.

At that point I was very confused; I was confused about how I was going to turn that guy down without hurting his feelings. It was obvious that he was playing the field and didn’t care about me. He was trying as hard as he could to get me because he now found himself solo and no girlfriend to sleep with.

The first thing I told him was besides not having the same feelings about him as he did for me, that I couldn’t be with a “cheater.” His response was comical, “ohh I would never cheat on…we would be so close in that I would not have the temptation.” Right after that I got sick to my stomach thinking, “I hooked up with a slime ball.”

Personally, I think that getting to know someone before you get intimate with them shows a lot about the person. It shows that they care about YOU and not only what you look like.

So as you can guess I’m dating the guy I met at my friend’s birthday party and I’m so happy! This guy is completely perfect - great sense of humor, personality, intelligent, and not too mention not bad on the eyes.

Last weekend, he took me to see a movie it was the cutest thing, he did the arm-stretch and put his arm around me. He gives me little butterflies in my stomach when he kisses me - having that feeling makes me realize that I would risk anything right now to make it work between the two of us. And I believe that he is the same way.

I’m excited to see what happens between the two of us and will keep you posted. If I can give any advice I would say, “Take a risk on the unexpected it might just be what you’re looking for…”

I’m thinking to myself…did he just say “I don’t know”. Then I asked him, “Are you afraid of me or something?” I really did not get it. First off we are not together anymore. About a month prior we decided to take a step back, and just be friends (there are a lot of reasons for this decision, but I’m not going to get into it all. Even though we took a step back we still cared about each other). I did not care about a girl calling him, he is not committed to me, or anything like that…we are friends…but does he go around lying to his other friends too?

Now I am starting to question everything about him…maybe he is not the Prince Charming I thought he was. Sure I never had to open a car door, but I’d rather open a million car doors on my own than have someone that I care about lie to me. Do I even know this guy that I was letting myself falling in love with 4 months ago? Confusion overtook me. Does he even like me…maybe this is all wrong…can he even talk to me…he’s only opened up once, the day we decided to stop dating…is he uncomfortable around me, do I make him uncomfortable…as all of these thoughts are going through my head I was wishing he would just say something…I’m sorry, I was half asleep, and give me a kiss on the forehead or something…why could he not say anything? I felt my eyes swelling up with tears.

I needed to get off the couch and go into my bed. I thought he would leave, but he didn’t. He came up stairs to sleep next to me…I laid there crying as he fell back asleep. My mind still racing as I cushioned my head in the damp pillow…why did he lie, should I talk to him anymore…I have these other guys that seem to really like me, that listen to me, talk with me, and want to be with me and I am blowing them off for him…why? I am not going to call him again, why should I want to talk to him again…he won’t share any deep feelings or emotions with me…it’s just superficial bullshit, and I am not a superficial girl. I care so much, sometimes I think I care too much…I care too much about others, about making everyone happy…are you hungry, thirsty, can I do anything for you? I am not complaining…I like who I am. I just want to be appreciated…I don’t need you to buy me a dozen red rose, I would rather you talk to me, share your life, feelings, emotions, fears, goals, ambitions, and dreams with me…and I will listen and share mine with you.

This is the kicker…he never leaves movies at my house…ever. So, the next morning he woke up and left for work before me. When I got up for work his pile of movies were sitting down stairs on the table…maybe it was an accident, but I remember his hat and something else sitting right next to those movies last night, and those items were gone, so why did he leave the movie?? Did he know how I was feeling that night…did he know that I did not want to talk to him ever again? Did he think that leaving movies at my house would give him another chance?

To be continued…Can I Forgive Him?

Flip flops are no longer just for the beach as they can be coordinated with jeans, khakis, skirts and dresses. Several of my friends that have gotten married over the past several years have worn flip flops with their wedding gowns…and I will be no different.

I will be getting married on the beach next year, and let me tell you I will not be trying to wear heels and walk in the sand. Sure I thought about going bare foot, but the sand is truly just too hot. I found the perfect solution…a luxury flip flop. I first saw these sporty flip flops in the April issue of Women’s Health, but when I went on the PecheBlu website I was blown away. They actually make crocodile flip flops.

Check out what I will be wearing for my beach wedding.

I’ve done it again, I placed someone of a pedestal and I’m not sure it is where they belong. I need to bring him down to my level, so that I can see him from a different perspective. He’s just like me, he’s not perfect. I have to stop being afraid to tell him how I feel…I guess what I am most afraid of is that I do not know what he will say back…does he really like me? How much? I must like him a lot since I have not been able to get him off my mind.

Do I tell him I think he might be everything I have always been looking for…I’m not sure now, because I am starting to question how much I know him. Once he started pushing away I just shut down…I couldn’t figure out what I did wrong. I wasn’t pushing or pulling too much, I was just being me, I mean maybe he doesn’t like me, maybe he wants to find someone else…I guess it is possible that we are not right for each other, I just thought we could be perfect together…I just felt this strong connection with him…I still feel a connection, but it has changed.

I want him to be happy, I want to make him happy, I wish I knew the right thing to do…

The Eskimo have hundreds of words for snow, and we’ve invented three times that many words for relationships, but the more words we invent the harder it becomes to define. In a world where you can date without sex, screw without dating, and in the end keep most of your sex partners as friends long after the screwing is over…what really defines a relationship?

I wrote about the difference between “dating” vs “boyfriend/girlfriend”, but let’s dig a little deeper into relationships.

First I think it is fair to say that any person that you are in a relationship with is also a friend. In friendships/relationships we establish a social relationship, often interpersonal. Interpersonal relationships vary in their many degrees, including intimacy and sharing. Generally people are able to establish a relationship due in fact that they share things in common.

So the relationship has been establish…let’s try to define it. While we have created hundred of words for relationships, I think that we can categorize it down to less than ten: marriage, a long-term romance, lovers, soulmates, boyfriend & girlfriend, significant others, mistress, friends with benefits, or just friends (purely platonic)

Now comes the hard part…sustaining the relationship. Having a lot in common is great, but that is not always enough to withstand relationship woes. More often than not relationships fail due to lack of honest communication and awareness.

To sustain a relationship, you need to be perceptive…listen, pay attention to body language, and sometimes you have to read in between the lines. Remember it is best to maintain interaction, encourage openness, and be completely honest with each other. There is no reason to hide how you feel, even if you are afraid that you may offend your partner. I have learned that keeping your feelings in will not facilitate a closer bond, but rather weaken the bond that was initially created.

You may find it difficult to communicate when you partner builds up a wall, or seems disconnected, but I think there are many ways to open the connection. One of the best ways to open the lines of communication is to ensure that your partner is comfortable with you, and also that they trust you. A good way to instill trust is to share personal details of your own life…maybe tell them something that not everyone knows. By trusting or confiding in them, they may become more comfortable to confide in you. You can share details of your life, your childhood, or your best kept memories. One of my favorite casual and fun ways to learn about a person is to play “never have I ever”…while they are often single statements, it tells you a lot about a person’s character, demeanor, values, and even their sense of humor. Be creative, and open-minded…if you and your partner are looking for the same things, by working together you can both find it!

I guess everyone wants to find that “perfect” relationship, but I think that there are relationship requirements that need to be met in order to even come close to getting it right.

Is it possible to find both a mind blowing physical connection and an intellectual relationship? I guess only time will tell.

This is a handy communication guide that should be as common as a driver’s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

Dangerous:

• What’s for dinner?
• Are you wearing that?
• Why are you so worked up?
• Should you be eating that?
• What did you DO all day?

Safer:

• Can I help you with dinner?
• Wow, you sure look good in brown!
• Could we be overreacting?
• There are a lot of apples left.
• I hope you didn’t over-do it today.

Safest:

• Where would you like to go for dinner?
• Wow! Look at you!
• Here’s my paycheck.
• Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
• I’ve always loved you in that robe!

Ultra Safe:

• Here, have some wine.
• Here, have some wine.
• Here, have some wine.
• Here, have some wine.
• Here, have some wine.