What do you want from ME????
Ok, Im 3 months into whatever the hell this is, and he still hasn’t had the decency to ask me out.
Let me explain, I have been chatting with this guy for the past 3 months, we have spoken on the phone about 3 times, and have met just once. Theres just sooo much flirting that goes on between the two of us, but when it comes to turning it into something real… he just wimps out. I dont know what to do with this guy. And because of this Im unsure about the way he feels about me. There are times when we are so alive, you know, chatting all day, flirting, teasing each other… and then there are these spells of silence, wherein I have no idea what hes doing. And that’s like hitting rock bottom. I feel so low, its hard to explain. I feel like maybe hes found some dirt on me and doesn’t want me anymore, or then hes got someone else now. Its not like hes made any commitment towards me, for him to explain his every move to me, but still it just keeps messing with my head. I just keep dropping hints for him to ask me out, but he seems to miss every single one of them. Or then its just intentional because hes just not that into me at all. All he sees in me is a friend with whom he can engage in some healthy flirting and that’s that. Maybe he just does not see me as girlfriend material.
Its just so complicated, but I want clarity. Sometimes I contemplate directly asking him whether hes into me or not, but I don’t wanna ask him over the phone, its just not the right way to do it. But the problem is that he doesn’t seem to wanna meet me in person, so how the hell am I gonna ask him? It’s a vicious circle. And im stuck in it. Ok, what signals that hes giving out am I interpreting wrong. Is it normal for a guy to chat with a girl every minute that hes free, telling her about every thing hes doing and wanting to know about everything shes doing? Is it ok for him to stand by his window say good bye to her every morning when she is leaving for work? Is it even remotely acceptable for him to send pictures of his sister and his childhood home to a girl hes never actually met in person? Its all messed up. Do guys generally keep a girl, whom he just considers to be his friend, up till late in the night just chatting her up? Is it ok for guys who are just friends to complement a girl on and off? Ya, I guess ive got it ALL wrong.
Its like I wear the pants in all this. It was I who actually had the nerve to ask him out before he agreed at first but called it off saying he was busy. But he made no attempts to pre or postpone it. Im just so mad at him now. He just doesn’t seem to pick up on any hints that I throw at him about asking me out. Why am I acting so desperate about it today? Because apparently today is the only day hes gonna be free. After that he’ll be occupied most evenings. And since ive already done the asking out one time before and fallen down on my face I don’t wanna face that humiliation again. All I want is for him to quit playing around. If you have serious feelings for me just tell me. On paper hes perfect, so I don’t wanna waste any more time playing cat and mouse. And besides, how long can I wait?
Like stifler said in one of the American pie movies…. You snooze, you lose. That’s right, one day another guy will just flick me out from under his nose and he will just sit there gaping at us. And there will be nothing he can do about it. That’s when he will wish he would have made a move, just done something to let me know how he feels.
Right now all im feeling is unappreciated. I feel like a play thing that you will use when you are free, and at other times, you have something else to fill your time. If u don’t have feelings for me, quit flirting and wasting my time.
But if you really do like me just man up, and tell me how you feel, or then give me a chance to tell you how I feel. And if there is some higher power up there looking down at me fuming right now, please try and understand my position. Please give that jerk some sense as to how to treat a lady. Give him some realization about what hes doing wrong and how he can make this right.
This post was submitted by Sileefern.
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@Sileefern: (Your post was edited by staff)
Hate to say this.. but he is displaying all the signs of a married man. Have you checked that?
Well, most of the time I can send a long comment to someone but in this case it will be short. He sounds like a game player just messing with your head. Just move on and break all ties and communication with him. He’s only leading you on. He sounds like he doesn’t know what he wants and clearly you do know what you want so forget him. Like the saying goes, there’s plenty of fish in the sea.
One of two things are happening:
1) He’s emotionally cheating on someone he’s already with (usually emotional cheating is even worse than physical cheating)
2) He doesn’t want a relationship with you (reasons are irrelevant) but keeps in touch because he enjoys flirting and having those kinds of conversations with women regardless of whether he’s with them or not.
Either way this person doesn’t sound worth the effort.
I’d tell him to go find someone on omegle or chatroulette to flirt with since that’s about as productive as his interactions with you have become.
Tonight I will be found dead.
I need to die to feel alive.
I don’t get the point of life.
I really don’t.
I don’t want to be here anymore.
I’m sorry.
I just, I can’t take this anymore.
The human species and the drama in life and the imposed
normality of society, I just hate it all.
Everyone’s so fake here and it’s something I don’t want to
be a part of.
I’m sorry everyone, don’t take it personally.
I’m going to keep this short cause there’s no use in writing
a novel.
This was my decision and I don’t want you to be hurt by it.
Just please try to understand this is what I needed, this is
what I wanted, this is what I choose.
Think of me as selfish, think of me as stupid, judge me, I
know you all will. Part of me wishes you wouldn’t but I know
better.
Hate me if it makes you feel better. Forget me if it gets
rid of the tears.
Just understand that none of you ever understood me, not one
of you.
There was only two people who ever did. One betrayed me, she
know who she is. And the other, well he was just busy.
And if you ask why I didn’t turn to any of you for help when
I needed to talk, it was because you were never there and
when you were you were oblivious to just how bad I was
hurting. I helped all of you with your problems. I always
did everything I could to help you out, to keep you going,
to make you see things would get better.
So where were you guys when I needed that?
Where the fuck were you? Huh?
Not to be bitter about it, but you just don’t get how bad that hurts.
Anyway, this world is a ruthless cold place that only gets worse.
I hurt people
People hurt me
It’s a vicious cycle of the world that I no longer wish to
be apart of.
Not to mention the fact I can’t stand myself anymore which also farther fuels my decision to die.
I wish things were different; but seeing as how they cannot be, I am done.
Please; if you don’t believe anything, anything at all, just
believe me when I say I’m sorry.
Cause I really am.
Love,
No one important.
P.s. @shazz do whatever you want with my account. it doesn’t matter anymore.
@wilson: What the heck are you doing?
Email me on ishazz.ihm.2013@gmail.com
Right now….. and I will talk with you about this.
If you dont email me..or reply to this post.. then I will put a trace on you and notify the authorities.
i think shazz and pengu make good points but if he’s anything like me it might be that he distances himself from getting too personal with new people. if all you both have done is flirt then he may think you do this with any guy, i’d think the same. i think if you want the truth you should get serious and confront him about it. if he doesn’t give you the answers you want then that’s on him and you should let him go find someone who wants to play his games. i hope this turns out the way you want it to and that he’s not a total douche.
@shazz Relax, okay? I did post to you and i can assure you that the post above is not even my own words. I copied and pasted it, that’s all. so i’m not actually gonna commit suicide. but the p.s. part is my words, though cause i am so sick of these women (excluding you) bashing me and making me feel bad every moment of my life. i wish i’d never came across this website to begin with. all the hateful, all the generalizations, i’m tired….
You know, the last time I asked you to ban me, you decided not to and said it was my decision of whether or not i wanna stay here. But this time, please do it. Please. I don’t wanna be here no more. Aside from defending myself on here, i have homework to get done and other hobbies on the internet (mainly music) i like to do.
I have replied to your email .. take care wilson. Just remember that you must not say that online again. As Admin Im bound to act on it.
Hugs.. Shazz
(Account deleted)
you handled that well shazz, i’m impressed.
Thank you.
Now.. everybody back on Topic please.
Hi,
I hadn’t expected as many comments in response to my first post, but thanks a lot to everyone who commented on my first post. Actually I didn’t do much justice to the post of the people who read it because I just copied and pasted it from one of my digital diaries, I had no idea so many people would actually offer their comments. I would also like to respond to some of those comments. I belong to a small, conservative town in India. I guess he is conservative and shy too, that’s why he hasn’t made a move yet. I know for a fact that he’s unmarried, not sure whether he’s single though. He lives with his cousin and another friend in a building next to mine. We belong to the same church and that’s where we got to know each other. Actually I’m not trying to defend him or anything, just needed to get my facts straight. But I guess all of you are right, I need to move on. He may or may not be interested, and I can’t keep waiting forever. My parents have already started looking for prospective grooms for me and if they find someone better than this guy, I’m totally in!!!
Here is the thing. A man cannot care about a woman. A man can only care about his genitals and himself, in that order.
Wise words indeed…..
No, but seriously, flirting?
I don’t know why you’re making a big deal out of this.
Flirting with someone does not mean that you’re actually into that person, at all. It’s just for fun.
I think that he just enjoys talking to a woman, and it might not matter which one.
@btm-Well, though rare, I do think there are good men out there, somewhere. My aunt has been married to the same man since like 1996. He views my cousins as his kids, and is very good with my mentally challenged cousin as well. They also adopted an autistic boy several years ago. They travel every year and seem very happy.
I only hope that I’ll find someone who loves me.
@Sileefern-All I can say is if it’s meant to be, it’ll be. I suggest not initiating anything, including conversation. Let him come to you. In the meantime, do other things, like hobbies, work, focus on school (if applicable). If he’s playing games, let him go, at least until he mans up and lets you know what’s up.
Don’t take my word it, though. I’m single and waiting.