I have been sexually harassed
Possible triggers for sexual harassment
I have a paper route, and sometimes people come out to talk to me for a few moments when they come to take their paper from me. There was one man in particular who would always come out to greet me. He would talk, I would listen … It was nothing serious. As an older man (70-80 years), he has a lot of stories about his past, etc. That was fine. What wasn’t okay was him telling me that I am cute and that he wished that he were younger so that he could flirt with me (which he did despite his age. I refrained from saying anything). That went on for about a year. It was creepy, and I told everyone around me about his actions, but no one saw anything suspicious, so I continued to deliver his papers, and he would continue to greet me. Never once had he touched me until about one year ago. He held me tightly and kissed my cheek and tried to bite my ear. I felt trapped, but I was soon able to leave without causing any suspicion. (Although as I turned away, he ran his hands down my back) I quickly hurried home and called the police, who did nothing. The officer claimed that the man was like a grandfather (excuse me, but what kind of “grandfather” sexually harasses their “granddaughter”?). The officer went to talk with the man, but after 15 minutes, the officer returned to say that he cannot do anything and that I should just simply ignore the man. I was only 15 years old when this happened. I learned from the event and after a brief case of gender dysphoria and anger, I moved on from the incident. I had a bit of trouble walking past his house when I had to deliver papers again, but it got easier.
Fast forward about 9 months later, I had to stay at my uncle’s house because it is significantly closer to the airport than my house. My uncle said the same things as the man that first sexually harassed me. He said he wished that he were younger, he called me cute, and before I went to bed, he kissed my cheek. I was trapped yet again. I locked the door before I went to sleep. The worst thing is that my own father was in the same room with me when I was sexually harassed by my uncle. Because I was travelling the next day, I tried to forget the event. Today, I finally expressed that I was sexually harassed, but I was completely ignored.
I am so tired. I resent men because I was sexually harassed. I feel like I have to put up a wall between men and myself. I can’t sit around and wait to be raped. I am frustrated – if I were a man, this wouldn’t have happened to me. Screw patriarchy. Screw misogyny. Screw inequality. I don’t want to hate men. I am just scared of any future relationships with men … not that I even want a romantic relationship with a man. I would like to be at peace, however.
This post was submitted by Young.