hate

Posted on January 18, 2010 by monykah

I hate men. I hate the games that have to be played with them.I hate the fact that they want women so bad sexually, if you have sex with them too quickly, they leave. It hurts so bad. I hate to think of how many men I have had sex with (only because I desire intimacy/closeness) and KNOW that I meant nothing to them (and vice versa). I’ve only had 2 real boyfriends, but several partners.

I hate the way men try to give you the bare minimum, but will take everything if you allow them to. The other day I was texting with a guy that likes me and I told him that I had gotten laid off of my job. He then says, “oh, you’re at home?” After I tell him yes, he proceeds to ask me if he can come over and watch tv with me. Call me crazy, but that made me so so angry! He has never ever invited me out to dinner, lunch, a movie, bowling, or any other type of date, but he wants to come over my house, kick off his shoes, watch my cable on my tv, sitting on my couch, in my house, where I don’t even know how I’m going to pay rent at this month. If there is one thing I know about men (especially those that will invite themselves over to your place of residence, or you to theirs) they want to try to establish some false sense of intimacy with you, put their arm around you, touch your leg, try to kiss you, eventually hoping it will lead to sex. All without them ever having to spend a dime on a damn date.

I hate men who approach me who are way out of their league. And I get so frustrated with myself for being so damn polite to them, and not wanting to hurt their feelings.

I hate how I have to pretend not to like the guys that I’m really interested in, knowing that if I pretend that I couldn’t care less about them, they will chase me to the ends of the earth. But if I am genuine and authentic, and show that I like them, they really aren’t interested. It’s the most unnatural thing in the world to pretend as if you don’t like someone when you actually do.

For every man that I have ever had sex with, I hate you. I hate you for making me feel worthless in your eyes, when I was simply trying to share a part of myself with you. I hate you for making me doubt myself. I hate you for making me have such a negative outlook on men. I hate you for making me cry. I hate you for not even making the sex worth my time.

This post was submitted by monykah.

sweet sue

I am 53 and single by choice following a near lifetime of crap from males. I was beaten and sexually abused numerous times as a child. My own father beat the crap out of all of us and my mom ,and the cops, males of course, did nothing. Sexism is rampant because men want control over women and are true only to their crotches. If women ran things, the world would be a better place.
Am I bitter ? Sure but I was not born this way; I was made this way, I love my kids and my dog but have no use for men. If you think they’re ass&^%$# now, wait until they age . YUK ! At least some were good looking back then…

I have neen humiliated, beaten, spit upon in the face, stolen from, and lied to , used and betrayed. Counseling ? For what? One counselor told me that considering all I have been through, it’s a wonder that I am not gay or nuts.

Men need women more than women need men. A slick campaign orchestrated by retail markets to make women think they’re too fat, ugly, hairy and smelly to attract a man and if they shape up then prince charming filthy rich good guy will come looking for them and you will be happy forever is BS.

I am content more than I ever have been in my life without a man to push me around.
K’sera

I’m so glad I read what you wrote Monykah I feel the EXACT SAME WAY!!!! I could go on and on but simply put I hate men I just fuckin hate em. To my misogynist ex boyfriend to my cousin who molested me, to my neighborhood highschool crush that took advantage of me to the losers I’ve dated who made it seem like they’re such great guys but only want sex. Fuck these assholes. I hate men.
K’sera

You too Sweet Sue!!! That’s so true—we have all this pressure to be all this for men who don’t even deserve the time of day. I’d rather be alone forever than with a man, with their controlling ways, the insecurities that they project onto women, the verbal and physical abuse. It’s so discouraging and just makes me hate them.
Hecate

It truly is amazing that men claim to love sex so much. If they really are obsessed with it, why are they so BAD at it? Most could not find a clitoris to save their sorry lives. They are impotent in mind and body.
Twisted Transistor

Ahhhhhhh……ok I’m new to this forum, and this is my first post. I’ve been reading on here the last hour or so and have found this site to be a breath of fresh air. Not that the topics are new, because they are ageless, but just to find a group of women who feel like I do every day and finally have somewhere to vent! Thank you ladies!

Hecate: because they are also lazy… and selfish….the same reason they would just as soon watch porn than actually have sex…it’s easier
sweetsue

Some days are emotional meltdown days for me; thank goodness ot doesn’t happen too often but when it does, it all come back to haunt me. I become immersed in outrage and sadness and relive things. I wish I could forget but it’s always there. I do not think I can ever trust a man again. They basically wrung me out completely emotionally and I just don’t want to even be bothered but there is this part of me that still believes in miracles but I have grown to dislike men to the point that I would not be a good partner either way.

I don’t want to be dependent on them in any way.
sweetsue

I just wanted to be loved. Got sick n tired of hearing lose weight-smile more-dont be too smart around guys-men need to feel good about themselves-build their egos-don’t give in too soon…don;t make them wait for sex too long-

Fuck that and fuck them.
Lucinda

Hun I feel the exact same way. I fricken hate two men right now, because they both made me feel like an object. I feel used and abused. I hate them!
Matt

I laughed when I read this!!! This may be a women’s website or some BS, but I cannot believe this!!! This is life. Are you getting raped in Ruwanda as a kid? Are you on the brink of starvation in Ethiopia? All you have to do is worry about your poor little emotions being hurt. Big deal!!! As a man a cannot stand emotional women. I hate self pity and if sex is such a big deal for you guys, here’s an idea… DONT SLEEP WITH THEM!!!
Melissa

Monkykah, thank you for your comment about how men just want to come over to our houses for sex. It is so true. Sometimes I get so afraid of men liking me that I sometimes cover my head like a Muslim to prevent them from looking at me, even though I’m not really a Muslim. I’ve just studied alot of different religions. I usually do the Muslim covering thing as an outlet to feeling suicidal about feeling like an object. I’ve been pregnant twice. I have one baby in Open adoption. I see him three times per year. His name is Levi. I really hope that he grows up to be a proper young man who treats women right. About 6 months after my baby was born I wrote the birth fathers parents and told them about the baby, because he didn’t have the nerve to tell them. He called up the adoption counselor and complained that he was afraid to go home because I told his parents about his 6 month old baby. The adoption counselor took his side. Telling me that it was an evil thing to tell his parents about the baby and very Revengeful. Like I care that his parents are mad at him for having a baby. He deserves it, and they have the right to know that they have a grandchild even if they never see him.
sweetsue

Matt says:
February 2, 2010 at 5:06 pm
I laughed when I read this!!! This may be a women’s website or some BS, but I cannot believe this!!! This is life. Are you getting raped in Ruwanda as a kid? Are you on the brink of starvation in Ethiopia? All you have to do is worry about your poor little emotions being hurt. Big deal!!! As a man a cannot stand emotional women. I hate self pity and if sex is such a big deal for you guys, here’s an idea… DONT SLEEP WITH THEM!!!

~~~

So here’s Matt to define what is abuse and then to diminish the abuse we have experienced by telling us that it could have been much worse and for that we should be thankful.
Message to Matt: go fuck yourself. I do not need to justify my pain and suffering to you and neither does anyone else here. You lack the empathy and compassion to care anyway so why are you here?
As far as sleeping with men, I have chosen to be celibate. and the choice is easy now considering the men in my age bracket 50+ cannot get it up and they’re sickly and dependent. No thanks. I
http://thetruefrustrationofitall.blogspot.com/ Virgin Diaires Blogger

I know what you mean. Its that false sense of intimacy that kills us. Since when did dating become over rated? and why do we fall for the games,… I do this a lot now i don’t sleep with men but i am like a makeout bandit and i get all slutty when i drink and a cute guy shows me some interest. I hate men but i still have hope!
heather

FUCK YOU MATT!!!

that’s another fucking reason why i hate men…they have anger issues,and they think they rule the whole damn world.
Ladyluck

Matt, matt matt….lol…what a dick….even if you honestly believe what you’ve just said, why come on here and be a prick and kick off? Big deal – we’re slandering your sex on a website…men would never do that…..ha!
Women have come on here to express themselves freely and emotionally and despite what you may think of their views, your harsh reaction is so unnecessary…no one was gettin at you personally so…how do i put this? fuck off!

no such thing as a good guy….just a bad guy who thinks hes an angel…
Karissa

Hey Monykah, everything you have written is so true. I feel exactly and totally the same, I have been through so, so much, all men are the same, and frankly I wish I could go back and undo it all! But it’s done, and the best you can do is never repeat these mistakes and live your life with the utmost dignity and independence! Men are not required – treat yourself like a princess.
Karissa

And also to SweetSue, thank you so, so much – you have voiced EXACTLY what’s happened to me. You and Monykah put into words what I couldn’t.

I’m finished with men – it’s poison for me. Total poison. Always a backward step. Always destructuve. I hate men for doing this to me. The pain is always there, yes. Very hard to deal with. But thank you for making me feel not so alone with this stuff.
Kelly

OMG- I am in so much pain right now because of some stupid, dick, player who ‘likes me’ (apparently!!) but ‘doesn’t want a relationship’. What this basically translates to is ‘I want a fuck but you aren’t worthy of anything more’. I’m so angry. This might sound conceited but I swear this bastard doesn’t deserve me anyway!! I HATE MEN and I LOVE this blog.
To being single and happy!!!!
Miss Dawn

Hello Ladies!

I love this site and I just want to say I whole heartedly agree with Monikah! Although all men aren’t trash (I know a few exceptions in the Church) unless they are really truly trying to live up to something bigger than themselves as a God-Fearing man, then there is no hope for them as males.

As part of our hatred for them is the utter frustration that we need a good one! Our hopes and dreams of being mothers and having a strong man to protect us and provide can’t happen without one!

So I hate men because my dream cannot ever come true unless I find one good one who loves me.

I hate men because I I’m afriad I may be alone for the rest fo my life
I hate men because I may never get to wear that white gown
I hate men because almost all of them require petite females
I hate men because I’d like to have one
I hate men because none of them are interested in me only sex
I hate men because even the ones who want sex are too lazy to go about getting it the right way

And to Matt- If you dont want an emotional woman, then you need to become a homosexual!
Ladyluck

You know girls,

i had sex like a man once. I was drunk and i decided i wanted sex so i thought fuck it, i’m going to have sex with a guy tonight….so me and my friend ended up meeting these guys and we went back to their apartment nearby and i had very good drunk sex! I woke up the next day and thought shit what have i done…i then thought oh my god this is actually quite funny, i then said to the guy can u call me a taxi and i grabbed my friend and out we went. The guy was about to ask for my number and i just cut him off and away i went feel powerful and somewhat liberated…there were no strings attached, no emotional ties or promises or sweet talk neccessary – just sex – he didn’t need to hoax me into bed, i didn’t feel the need to be emotionally involved with a stranger – just sex

And after i thought to myself. i get why women do this! I get my why they just go out and treat sex and men the way men can treat us and because i felt so good after i thought yeah! this may be the way forward, just have sex like a man!….But then after..when i really thought about it… i realised it wasn’t about the sex…it never was. It was just a moment of madness because i was angry at the guy i fancied who was my friend who took another girl home that night…

At the end of the day, for me. I don’t want just sex….even though i know i can get it and i could probs handle it like a man if i wanted to…but i don’t want to! And women shouldn’t be the only ones that wants sex and love!
so…
i hate men for not wanting more than just sex……
i hate the men who say they are straight to the point, honest and hate playing games. You know the ones who use the “honesty” card as a way of sayin “look babe if i don’t like you i will just tell you. If it’s not workin for me, i won’t be long telling you!” and YET they are the worst kind who lie and cheat
i hate men for knowing what to say until u break down your barriers
i hate them for hurting me and making me have to re-build my defences
i hate them
sweetsue

Miss Dawn posted ( snipped):
I hate men because almost all of them require petite females

and why is that ? because smaller women are easier to control physically.
sweetsue

Men should not be in charge of government. Look what happens as soon as one gets elected; their crotches start to wander. Party affiliation doesn’t seem to matter; it’s all about how their tiny crotches control their thinking and behavior.

John Edwards is a lying asshole for denying the baby was his, for denying his affair and for HUMILIATING his wife. Likewise the others in office. Screwing around when they should be fixing America. Men should NOT hold public office!

Addition to this, men should take meds to control their crotches but they won’t.
For those ailments exclusive to women, there is mydol. Why nothing for that which ail men, their wandering slut crotches causing them to lie, cheat, deny, be derelect in duty, commit perjury, steal..all just to satisfy their dicks.
http://twitter.com/Zealousbeauty zealousbeauty

I completely understand you honey. Everything you said sounds like what I’ve been through with men. I used to feel like I was never going to find a good man. For a long time I was bitter. But I realized that I had to play the game how it’s supposed to be played. Don’t be so quick to get your feelings involved. With every guy you talk to go in strictly for friendship. Keep your options open. (Talk to more than 1 person at a time) That way if they mess up you won’t be so hurt. I know you don’t like playing games, but that’s what they do….so do it back. Don’t show any signs of love at all.
http://EllenBabiisims3.piczo.com Ellen

I am fourteen and I hate guys too… But they know that we also love them, thats why they are like that…
Tiffany

This is true. I used to have sex with men all the time and they would just leave and like you I only had two real boyfriends. One of which I married but cheated on me all the time. And now the guy that I am with I feel like he is using me. I don’t know it blows. And to Matt Fuck off!!! We hate you
Hillary

All males are the fucking same. They think with their USELESS dicks. I haven’t been asked on a DATE in YEARS, only to “come over” to their place or for them to come over to mine. Fucking pricks.
Mad

I never want another man to touch me again. I don’t want to care about their feelings. I don’t want to laugh with them, or even get close to them. they are like poison. They make you grovel, they waste your time, they make you feel like shit, and they use you. Then they leave you, or make you leave them. They are the most selfish, disrespectful, disgusting, ungrateful pricks to ever walk the planet. They might as well beat you up, take all your money, leave you naked and in an alley to die. They walk away scott free after your independence, your inner beauty and your soul have been ripped from you. I would rather be gutted than hurt by another man. To Matt: FUCK YOU. You inconsiderate asshole with no heart. I’ finding it harder and harder to have hope for the future. I will be honest. I’m 5’10, blonde, thin, my friends think im funny, im honest, NOT clingy, no weird habits, I’m very smart and very successful…SO WHATS THE PROBLEM???? Men are just pricks. someone please give me some kind of hope. AND NO, I DON’T NEED A FUCKING COUNSELOR.
daizyduke

Im just so damn sick and tired of the world in which we live in today and the things we have to deal with , just to fulfill this God given desire that was birthed into us, called “Love!” We live in the age of selfish men, they are such lovers of self, and girls we will never be able to compete with that. It’s alright for them to “hook-up” and they feel good about themselves for it,and it boils down to the fact that their emotions, “if any at all” are buried so deep in their soul that they have totally lost contact with who they know they really ought to be in order to cause our society to function with love and peace, as we women still truly desire. Its sad, and I will admit that I yearn to have my soul mate! Is there such a thing out there? Are we all just so screwed up as a society whole? What is “LOVE” ? Why do we want it so badly? I get so damn angry!!!! I just want my heart to harden so bad! I for some reason wont let it though, bc I know deep down that it will cause me to be what I know I am not meant to be. I get so tired of trying to figure out men. They all say the don’t want any “DRAMA,” when all that I have met are indeed the “DRAMA.” Its that they dont want the competition.
They demand all the attention and control! We as women, do not seemingly matter. They are self lovers! Game players! Talk about mind games and control!!!!! Men have it down to a perfection!! I wont let myself play games, my god its hard enought dealing with all this to add to the mentality of having to play stupid childish games! I want to say it for all women, “I HATE MEN!!!!!” God help us women to find a balance somehow!!!!
Jodi

I’m so, so glad I found this forum. I felt like I was the only person in the world who felt this way, and when I searched for “I hate men” on Google, I wasn’t sure that I’d get any results. Now I’ve read all these posts, and it makes me want to post too. So. . .

I hate men. They can all fuck themselves in the ass with their dicks. At least then they wouldn’t try to shove them in every godforsaken hole that we have. I swear it, I fucking hate ‘em! To Matt, fuck you and your talk of our emotions, you sex-crazed little prick. Go drown in a vat of your own semen and put us all out of your misery. Fuck men. Fuck them all.

Honestly, I’m so fed up. I think I’d go crazy if I couldn’t write this down. I hate men. I hate that I was touched by someone I trusted, turned to another man for support who I thought would be nice, but who only wanted sex himself. And I just broke up with a guy who I thought was the sweetest person in the world. When my back was turned, he wanted sex too. Fucking prick.

We had sex awhile; then I told him I wasn’t ready, and asked if he would stop. I can’t tell you how many times I asked him. He said how unfair that was, that I should want to have sex because I know it makes him happy. He said it’s like doing the dishes; even though you don’t wanna, you do them because you know the other person likes it. I said he was wrong, that sex and dishes are two different things; sex is uncomfortable and violating when you don’t want to have it in the first place. Anyone who insists you do something that makes you uncomfortable is an asshole.

I said that if a person doesn’t want to have sex with you, then there are probably other underlying issues within them that need to be examined, issues like trust and commitment that are the foundation of a good relationship. I don’t know if I’m right, but I hope I am. Somebody please tell me that sex and dishes aren’t the same thing. Please, someone tell me. . . A girl has the right not to have sex if it makes her uncomfortable, even if it means the guy’s loss. If he loves you enough, he’ll wait, right? I mean, anyone who needs sex to make them happy needs a kick in the balls. Then how happy would they be? If getting sex by fear isn’t rape, what is?

I’m so sorry for making this post long. I’m just really glad I found this site, and that I can vent my feelings. I hate men. I hate that we need them to procreate, that it’s a sin to be gay, that we are supposed to submit to them. Didn’t God know how they would turn out to be? I hate that they’re so fucking selfish and inconsiderate and insensitive to someone else’s needs. I just hate men. Period.
Michelle

I hate male liars.

I hate that women have to be in control of sex in order to have a relationship. Why the hell is there a double standard? Why cant women just as easily have sex as men and not be seen as a whore? Or as an object?

There is such a thing as RESPECT. Even though men arent obligated to have a relationship with a woman, they should at the least be KIND enough to tell her up FRONT that theyre only interested in sex instead of playing MINDGAMES.

Men: If you pursuade or coerce a woman into have sex, you are an abuser.

Im sick of men who are late to dates, who text or call only when they feel like it, who say they LOVE you and than treat you like shit.

Im tired of men who say “I love you baby” or “youre one of a kind” and then two seconds later arent responding to your calls! Godamn, at least tell me youre ONLY interested in sex instead of constantly playing games. Its childish, immature and shows how poorly your parents raised you.

Ladies, actions speak LOUDER than words. Dont give into a man who tells you what you want to hear, have higher standards and observe his actions.

A man who loves you will hold doors open for you, go out of his way to at least text you hes busy to show that Hes Alive and thinking about you, give you gifts of affection (not all the time, but once in a while to show he cares) whether that be poetry or even your favorite food, remember whats important to you and go out of his way to make you happy.
fed up

i’m pregnant for the 2nd time, the first time i miscarried… both times, i became pregnant by my partner by holding me down and ejaculating inside of me without my permission…it can’t be called rape, but i feel raped… i have protected sex to avoid pregnancy. the world is in shambles, and i’m not prepared to raise a child in this hot mess of a society. yet in still, i’m forced to deal with a baby growing inside of me, because this asshole snatched the condom off.
then, he had the nerve to be shocked when i talked about abortion (something i’m completely against, and NEVER thought i would have to deal with). just like the one before him, they both assumed i would be down for a exclusive relationship. make her pregnant so she doesnt leave? what part of the game is this?
i’m absolutely disgusted. he’s not returning my calls, i have my first ultra sound tommorow. he hasnt talked about money at all… but he’s talked about fuckin. especially since we wouldnt have to use a condom anyway…. are you serious? i never want to have sex again, let alone with this man that i cant trust. i wont let him come over, because i cant deal with the octopus arms. get off of me! have some control about yourself! i only fucked you because i was drunk! anything after that was me trying to make sense of the drunk sex!
i’m pregnant, scared for the future. meanwhile, he clubs and kicks it whenever he wants. more than likely collecting numbers for future conquests. everytime i talk to him, i can hear the thirsty for sex tone in his voice. disgusting. he’s also 17 years older than me. didnt tell me until afterwards. its the one night stand that wont go away. men do it all the time. i do it, and my life is changed forever. all from his selfish acts. he calls himself “the bedroom bully”. in other words, doesnt take “no, i’m tired” as a means to stop. now i’m pregnant, for not having the strength to knee him in the balls when i had the chance…i hate men.
Caz

I feel so much better after reading all these comments, and know that I am not the only woman to feel so much hate and resentment for men. They really do make me feel sick. I try so hard to be a good person, and not feel hate for anyone, but it can be difficult. Especially when men leer at you and treat you like you are nothing but a sex object, a piece of meat that they think they can have sex with. Who the hell do they think they are? and why do most of them seem to think they are god’s gift to women who just can’t be resisted. They think with their dicks and don’t give a shit about how much they hurt you, as long as they and their horrible disgusting dicks are happy then that is all that matters. They are selfish, useless, lazy, nasty horrible beings to walk the planet, and many of them seem to be on a mission only to destroy. And why do they seem to think us women need them? we don’t actually need them for anything. I much prefer enjoying my own body than having some disgusting hairy man touch me. I’ve been single for nearly 2 years, and i love it. I will never ever be in a relationship with a man again, and if any man ever tries to touch me again i will kill him, i swear to god. They can all go to hell. And it’s true, many of them do purposefully go around impregnating women to trap, control and ruin their lives forever for their own selfish evil reasons. They are nothing but big bundles of nasty insecurities and weaknesses. Just the thought of being with a man again makes me feel physically sick. God, i’m sorry but i just hate them so much.
Annie

Jodi,

You are absolutely RIGHT that you do not have to have sex till you are ready. I do think it’s more difficult if you have already had sex, so I would honestly suggest that if you meet some-one new, wait for as long as you need until you know you can trust him. A guy that is a good guy(there are a few left), WILL wait.

Sex is completely different than the dishes. We do the dishes, because it’s necessary even if we don’t like it. But when we DO the dishes and don’t like it, we are not trying to gain personal pleasure at some-one elses expense.

As soon as a man tells you that you should do something you do not feel comfortable doing, he is treating you as an object. Apart from the fact that women get PREGNANT through sex, and bear the costs of this, STD’s that would not affect men can kill us, and we attach to men through sex(read up on oxytocin). There is a very, very good reason to wait.

God the stuff men have said to me so they can have sex with me, it’s ridiculous.

I got told I was a man-hater last night, because I told a guy that I didn’t like casual sex, wouldn’t sleep with him and I prefer waiting a long time before being with a man. I was then told I would end up a very lonely 80 year old, that I was odd, that I was negative, I think too much etc etc…

It is amazing the insults that a man is capable of delivering when you refuse to give him what he wants.

I do know, that not all are like this, but because we women are naturally built to “please” those in our social circle, men find it easy to manipulate us. Notice when it’s happening, and if they EVER make you feel bad or uncomfortable, if they pressure you…anytime this happens in anyway, understand what is happening and don’t let them make you feel badly so they can manipulate you emotionally. This is the tough lesson I’ve learnt.

Just walk away.
Caz

I know all men aren’t the same, and maybe there are some good ones out there. In fact I like men in general, but only as friends. If they ever try to pressure me for more, I tell them to back off. But I was recently very badly manipulated by my manager at work who i trusted and believed he only wanted to be friends. He said he wanted to take me out for a drink just as ‘friends’ and i stupidly believed him. God i hate myself for being so naive. As he got me drunk that night, he then convinced me that he wanted to make me happy and be in a relationship with him. I told him no cos i am happy being single right now. But he wouldn’t let go and kept going on and on. By the end of the night i was drunk, and he begged me to go back to his house where he promised he wouldn’t try to make me have sex with him. Him being my manager and a good person i stupidly thought, i trusted him and went back there. Okay, he didn’t rape me, but i was drunk and manipulated by him. Now, he’s made it clear he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me, and only wants to be friends. I feel so sick and disgusted with myself. I fucking hate him!!! I used to love my job but now i want to leave cos every time i see his face i just want to punch him.
Annie

Sigh, Sorry that happened Caz, yes he did take advantage of you completely.

This is why I have a rule for myself now, absolutely NOTHING physical with a guy, unless I am sober, and nothing until there is a commited relationship.

That gets rid of about 90% of the males that will approach me, which suits me just fine.
Caz

I agree with you Annie, thank you. You are very sensible. Personally, I just feel like I don’t want to go out again, or if I do go out I’ll not drink any alcohol cos obviously i can’t control myself under the influence. I think that’s why i feel so angry, cos I’m so disgusted with myself for being so easily led and tricked like that. Anyway…we learn from our mistakes, hey. I’ll know better for next time etc. But if a man ever does touch me again, I will break his fingers.
Andrea

I am in agreement with most all of you. As far as sex goes. Men are predators, they are trying to screw you, they like a challenge. The only thing that changes is the time-line. After they bust-a-nut, they treat you like like shit, whether you slept with them on the 1st or 14th date. After sex they all retreat and/or disappear because they got what they wanted. This isn’t just a personal observation, I was told this by my male counselor. He bragged about how he would do anything to screw a woman, including lead her on and play games for months, until she had sex and then he would disappear.

The sad thing is in today’s day, men have become increasingly cheap. With all the dating websites, they think they can order-up free or cheap sex while using their parents computer, living in their basement. Most of them are lousy lays, which isn’t so bad if they’re generous, but if not – forget it.

I had a dildo that’s always hard, is loyal and doesn’t expect me to pay or cook it anything. I think I’m in love.
Caz

LOL! That’s brilliant Andrea! That is exactly how I am now. I much prefer having sex on my own than being with some scum bag creep, who is crap in bed anyway. But I think it’s disgusting how my manager thinks he can get away with treating me like that, and saw me as a challenge. Not I or any woman deserves to be treated like that in the workplace. I was just minding my own business concentrating on my work being happy being single, and he wouldn’t leave me alone until he got what he wanted. I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me, but I just want to talk about it to make other women aware. Here is a link to a good website I found regarding laws in place about sexual harassment in the workplace. I think all women should be aware of them as it affects so many. http://www.safeworkers.co.uk/SexualHarassmentWork.html
One of the laws clearly states that men shouldn’t even look at women in a sexual way at work, which I agree with. And if that man continues to stare at me like he has been doing, I’m going to put a complaint in against him because he shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it. He’s disgusting. He’s just another dirty scumbag who can’t stop thinking with his dick.
Annie

LOL that dildo comment was hilarious.

I can’t say that all men are like this though. I would almost have thought it a while back, until I met a very, very wonderful man(friend), who has helped me through the most horrible times.

Thanks to him, I see men a LOT more clearly. There are good ones, there are bad ones, and sometimes there is just confusion as to how we are percieving them(and they us). I do get the man-hating vibe from time to time, and it makes me so sad to see so many women going through this. I usually get this vibe, around certain men. BIG red flag. I stay away.

It does make you think back to the day’s, when a woman required a commitment from a man(IE marriage) before she would be with him physically. I used to think that was old religions wanky panky. Now I’m starting to realize, they weren’t as stupid as I thought. Sex is so powerful, that people just use and abuse each other to get it, and in the process miss out on true trust, loyalty and intimacy.

Despite the lecherous attitudes of so many men, they are actually becoming increasingly lonely, looking for a woman to love them, but not knowing how to get it, and all that is left for them, is sex. So, they do whatever they can to gain a moment of fleeting , fake intimacy.

At least my gal-pals can give me the sharing and chit-chat I need. Men cannot get intimacy without sex. I almost feel sorry for them….almost
Caz

Hi everyone! I just wanted to let you know that I am feeling so much better now. I have been doing a lot of research on sexual harassment within the workplace, and I have typed out a long document stating exactly what that manager at work did to me and how he sexually harassed me for so long. I have even got loads of his emails where he made tons of unacceptable and inappropriate comments to me. I am going to give this document to someone high up at work next week and get that guy reported. There’s no way he’s going to get away with what he did to me. I don’t care if i lose my job over it either. There is no way i am going to go against my high morals and principles. I am standing up for what is right. Also, I don’t want him ever getting the chance to do that to another woman at work again.
Talitha

Hecate you are sooo right! I finally broke up with my first boyfriend of 10 yrs and thought I would enjoy single life and get to know a few men here n there. OMG! I have had the worst sex with guys that claimed they can hit the G-spot at least 3 times when they couldn’t even find it! Had one guy who’s dick was so small I couldn’t feel it…I found out very quickly that SIZE DOES MATTER along with the motion of the ocean! What’s the use of having a big dick and not know how to work it?! It really doesn’t do any good when a guy has a small ass wankie and SWEARS up n down he’s doing something! Hell, I should have been fuck buddies with my ex n bang that shit out! That way I know that I would have been satisfied. Playing the field left me sooo frustrated! So sexually frustrated that I burned out the motor on my vibrator! Hey! We should always keep a jackrabbit as backup.
Annie

Good for you Caz!! It takes courage to go through with it, but he has to know that it isn’t acceptable. I hope it works out.
Grace

Caz I think I love you! My thoughts exactly!
Caz

Hi everyone! I put that statement in against that manager at work for sexual harassment, and oh my god, and i can’t believe how amazing they have been. They are taking it very very seriously and have suspended him. He might even lose his job. I have even been to the police and told them what happened, although they can’t prove he raped me, i feel i was raped by him through his nasty manipulations. This could go to court. He got me very drunk and took advantage of me and really messed with my head. So now, I have decided i am never going to drink alcohol again and i am receiving rape counselling. Some people at my work have been judgemental and said it was my fault for being nice to him, but i don’t care what they think. What he did was wrong, and i will stand by my decisions to report him for the rest of my life. I hope to make other women aware of what type of sick selfish men are out there. If you suspect a man fancies you and you don’t feel the same way, you must tell him straight away and spell it out very clearly “I DO NOT FANCY YOU” and don’t worry about hurting their feelings because many men seem to think they are god’s gift and that manager was so in love with himself, he just couldn’t understand why i didn’t want to go into a relationship with him. He thought after buying me a few drinks and messing with my head all night, he could manipulate and pressure me into going into a relationship with him, and that was very very wrong.
Annie

Caz I am SO impressed by your actions!!! It is very difficult for women to go through with this because they do blame themselves and feel ashamed.

Although I woldn’t technically call this situation rape, being manipulated and used for sex (even if you do consent) creates the same psychological damage as sexual assult.

And YES, some men are so narcissistic, because THEY want to sleep with YOU, they cannot seem to understand when you do not feel the same way. So they co-erce, manipulate, ply you with booze, they even insult, belittle, intimidate and patrionize you till you give in.

I’ve been used sexually before, and it’s taken me YEARS to get over it. It was difficult for me to even admit to myself how I felt, because of the shame. We also have a society telling us we should be perfectly fine with casual sex, that it’s no big deal and only silly girls attatch their emotions to sex. This infuriates me, because the damage to your self-esteem and sense of identity is HUGE.

I hope the counselling helps, and am so proud of you for going through with this!!
Caz

Thank you Annie. I agree with you. That guy did insult and belittle me that night as he got me drunk. He said I should feel flattered to receive so much attention from him as he could have any woman he wanted (that guy was ugly and didn’t seem to realise it) and he said no other man would want to be in a relationship with me because of my age (28) and he said no man would be interested in me cos of my bad past (bad marriage where i suffered domestic violence for years). I don’t see why I should have to feel ashamed and blame myself for what he did to me. Yes, i shouldn’t have allowed myself to get drunk but i had good intentions and trusted him when he said he just wanted to be friends. He is a liar. I might not be able to get him done for rape, but i will see this investigation through regarding sexual harassment. As a manager he had no right to talk to me so inappropriately and chase me around the office like that. You are right, these type of men happily go around damaging women’s self-esteem and have no regards for women’s rights at all. I will get my self-esteem back, and I’m already feeling better about myself since putting this complaint in against him. In fact i feel a sense of pride for standing up for myself, and I hope to prevent him from putting another trusting innocent woman through the same hell he put me through.
Caz

Hi again! Just one more thing – I have decided to never drink alcohol again. No man will ever get the chance to manipulate and trick me like that again. From now on it’s just orange juice or coke for me. It’s much better and healthier than alcohol anyway. I will always be in control of my senses and gut feelings. I bet there are millions of men that trick drunk women all the time and take advantage of them. It’s terrible, but it will never happen to me again.
Annie

@Caz

I don’t think alcohol is really the problem, the manager was the problem. Should he be able to stand up in court and say it wasn’t HIM but the alcholol that manipulated you into doing something you didn’t want to? But if you think that alcohol is an issue then more power to you for giving it up. With alcohol it lowers our inhibitions, making us more likely to do something that is a mistake or to be manipulated and co-erced.

It’s actually kind of fun to go out and hang with friends and NOT drink. You can actually have some decent conversations. All the best.
Caz

Thanks for being on my side Annie. I really appreciate it. Did I mention that the police woman said it was my fault for being friendly and nice to him which encouraged him to do what he did? Unbelievable! Anyway…i will have a much better time when I go out now cos I will enjoy conversations better and will be able to talk without slurring like an idiot : ))
Annie

@ Caz.

LOL!! and no more drunken text messages…ever made those?
Caz

No but I have typed some very embarrassing emails in my time : (( – but never again : ))