by suicide
she dumped me,i tried to kill myself then spent one month, christmas, in a mental hospital
10:53 am in I Hate Men by suicide
first off, you have to know that i am not female, i have the utmost respect for women, except two, and am disgusted at the male race.
my girlfriend seemed to only want to hang out with me when she had nothing to do, and would only talk to me if there was nobody else in the vicinity.
i completely trusted this person, who shall remain nameless, i let them know all my secrets, and this was the only person i ever felt i could be myself around.
when i look back, i realize that she always treated me like carpet, something to wipe her feet on.
after eleven months she invites me over, and as always, i canceled whatever i had planned that day so i could see her.
i arrive with roses, i wold always take a gift, and when i look back, i realize that she never even thought enough of me to thank me for the gifts.
after half an our of talking, she starts making sexual moves, and keeps trying to advance. i told her her i wasn’t ready, and still in pieces from my breakup two years earlier, which was completely true, so what she does is tells me to leave and never come back.
all of this she already knew, that i still wasn’t over my last relationship and wasn’t ready for sex.
the month, when i finally went outside, i hadn’t seen anyone else for a while,
i went to the park down the road. i started crying and just stayed there on the park bench for hours, at about 8 pm, the caretaker came up to me to ask what was wrong.
i told the entire thing to a complete stranger,
and it turns out that it was her cousin. he explained to me that she had been cheating on me the entire time. he even showed me a picture of him, the other boyfriend, he had been given by her
i tried to commit suicide that night, then after a few days in hospital, i was made to stay in a mental hospital for a month. i got out three days ago and can’t even bring myself to go outside. someone from the mental hospital comes every day and makes me food, makes sure i eat, and talks to me for a few hours, i haven’t actually spoken since i met the park caretaker.
i think one of the worst things she did, apart from break my heart, is every step of the way, she was telling my secrets, my most personal information, the things i wouldn’t even tell my diary, to all of her friends, every step of the way.
i haven’t spoken to anyone for a month, haven’t said anything to anyone over the internet either, all i have done is sit huddled up in a ball, not getting any sleep and staring into nothing, a white wall, while ignoring the worker from the mental hospital.
and here i am pouring my heart out to complete strangers.
i should just kill myself…
you sound like a wonderful kind hearted man and killing yourself over this cheating woman is not the answer. i think a lot of us have been in the place where we felt like there was no one else for us and dying was the one answer…I have found that is the furthest from the truth and while many years later I am so happy in life and love life. Don’t be afraid to let in the people who care. Best to you.
many a girl would kill for what you tried to give her. you opened up too fast to her and she walked away. A mistake i make all too often myself.
she’s not good enough for you. don’t kill yourself over her just because she decided to use and abuse. if you do that, then she will have won without even trying. it’s probably in her nature to be that way. don’t hate yourself or try to kill yourself because she is inadequate to listen to your heart.
i wish you the best of luck in finding that amazing woman who will see you for how precious you are.
You’re wonderful. You deserve someone so much better. Hope you feel better, don’t commit suicide.
You Sound Like a Really Nice Guy. Someone Most Girls Out There Are Looking For. But To Try And Commit Suicide Over A Cheatin W***E I Think Was Pointless. U Gave Her The Satisfaction And For What? Never Let Anyone Get The Better Of You, I Learnt That The Hard Way. U Deserve Someone Really Nice and I Hate To Say It Better Than Me (Which is hard) :p. But I Hope You Find Your Happiness And Strength.
My, my, somebody was in a satirical mood….ha maybe you should have signed your name as jonathan swift instead of suicide. clever clever.
this man is not a ‘sweetheart’, he is a disturbed individual who needs intense therapy and self reflection. to the OP, dude get help. do NOT kill yourself. get serious about treating yourself with some love and respect. get ANGRY and act, because i am willing to bet good money that your hatred for yourself spilled into every aspect of your life long before any of these women were a glimmer in your eye. and when you met these women, they saw you coming a mile away. despite the warning signs, you allowed yourself to be abused and ignored the several road signs that this recent girl was not interested in enriching your life or sharing one with you. buying her gifts and not getting a thank you, trying to be everything and getting nothing in return, being lied to and laughed at behind your back….ladies – doesn’t this sound like exactly what men do to us? you cannot avoid this kind of treatment although you are smart, independent, beautiful, charming, kind, funny, or generous. i know. i am all of these things and i am sure most of the women here can attribute these qualities to themselves and more. there have been many tears and a lot of confusion about why i only draw assholes and scum unworthy of me into my life. i have been doing it my WHOLE dating life. when people say they’ve dated good men, it boggles my mind. i haven’t had the pleasure of attracting any. but i realized very recently, that i have a habit of giving of myself both physically and emotionally way too soon. before i even stop to check on if this person deserves the trust or the devotion i have draped him with. i think this is why it is always much later that we can come up with these ‘loser lists’ – all the asshole, unkind and downright abusive things the jerkoff did during the relationship that we should have used as an exit then and THERE. we cling so much to what we want, the relationship, the companionship, not to have to get out there and play ‘getting to know you’ again with someone else, the sex, the miniscule moments he’s not being a piece of shit…that we lose sight of our basic needs and show the person we are dating/married to that we do not deserve more from them because we do not demand more.
oh, and ladies, don’t blow smoke up this guys ass and reassure him that what he was doing in this relationship was healthy and that any woman would die to be treated that way. such a post immediately elicits our nurturing instinct. women in general fall for tears and drama so easily when it’s gussied up to be in our best interests! it ain’t: he kept seeing her even though she made it clear he was her backups backup. (yeah we love men who have no dignity) he dropped anything he was doing to run to her side (yeah we love men who have no life and suffocate us into being their sole reason to live) he brought the bitch presents every visit and she thanked him with her contempt (women love gifts from desperate men they aren’t interested in) and lastly, when he was granted audience with her, he spent it pouring out his sob stories and emotional baggage (playing armchair psychologist make us wet). please. but why did she try to sleep with him? because she had not been listening to a damn thing he said and thought he’d be useful for at least one thing. when he rejected her advances, she gave him the boot for suddenly having a modicum of a spine. the last part also sounds VERY familiar to me in my dealings with men! it is unfortunate that people will use you to bits if you allow it. but they will, dude. they most certainly will. you have to head that shit off at the pass. and do yourself a favor, don’t think for one moment, anyone wants to be your world. cliche that it is, no one will see any value in you if you cannot see it in yourself. finding yourself in this type of relationship over and over again is rooted in fear. no matter who i dated, i never really trusted them, due to my past. no matter who i dated, i never truly believed they would be different. in my heart i really hate men and think they are all the same jackass in different packaging. i shouldn’t be dating until i move past that and trust myself to make better decisions regarding them. and to the OP, you may be doing the same. you more than likely have a deep rooted mistrust or resentment of women rather than having respect for them. i knew a guy just like this. he was friends with my friend for 15 years. she would tell me his horror stories about cheating, skanky exes. he even had her fooled into thinking he was innocent. he too, ended up in the hospital ‘over a woman’. got to dating him shortly after we met, and at first yes, he was the dream guy we THINK we want, with the gifts and spending all this time together. but i shortly discovered that he loved all women only when shit was going his way. i was his shoulder during a horrible time, after his mother died from cancer. his last girlfriend was an unfeeling whore, etc. (boy did i make two huge mistakes- the rebound girl and the tragedy girl at once!) but no matter how much i was there to build him up, how sane i was in the face of his emotional bs, how directly opposite i was in comparison to his last girlfriend, he ended up sabatoging our relationship and then not only blaming me but going from ‘realizing mistakes and being madly in love with’ me, to calling me every name in the book in the process and discussing our relationship with people i didn’t even know. after it was over, he continued to bitch to our mutual friend about ‘not being able to find a good woman’ and she cut him off. he wasn’t interested in finding a good woman. he wanted the drama laden girl. he wanted conflict. he wanted to be able to toss on about how badly he gets treated. it was a odd sort of comfort to him. why? because the fucker is mentally unstable.
this last guy i was with was a doozy, because he just left. just disappeared without one word to me, any discussion, any argument after an 8 month relationship. added to that, i happen to know he is blithely going about his business as though nothing could be finer. the shock, the betrayal, the audacity of his actions. and i never contacted him to ask where he’s been, why he’s gone or any of that bullshit, because it would be pointless. i have my ‘loser list’ and hey..wasn’t he always a shit at communication…wasn’t it almost always by text? didn’t i always have to make the plans? didn’t he sleep until 1pm even after i drove half an hour to see him…didn’t he always use that annoying mocking voice when we argued even though he’s a 30 year old man…i never met his friends but he met mine…didn’the pull this disappearing act right before christmas…wasn’t i always his only social outlet because he was just that lazy…didn’t he once tell me his dream was to appear on the howard stern show…and on and on. so every day, i tell myself what a goddamn waste of my time he was and get on with my life. but for now, i despise, loathe, want to castrate and hate men.
Dear Friend,
Sorry to hear about ur trouble. I understand what your going through. sometimes when ppl we love do something nasty like that .. life feels hopeless.
the person who is disturbed is not you but her. She doesnt know what love is and is not capable of receiving it because she has not worth in life. She cheats on you and then she will cheat on her other boyfriend. The cycle will continue until one day, she is all alone..
my friend, there are kind hearted people out there who will be nice and considerate. I am sure its hard for you to trust anyone but take small steps towards happiness. Be sure to around ur family and friends who love and care for you and will advise you when things go bad.
Just replied to your last post first….know this was posted ages ago but I only jtus found this site!
Hope you’re feeling better now….I’m sorry to hear what an awful experience you had.
I know how you feel. I’m depressed too and its hard to have any faith in the world.
I don’t think you have much respect for yourself. I know its hard when other people don’t show you respect, but you need to learn to like and respect yourself. Then you won’t attract people like her and let people treat you badly.
You should try to find some hobbies and achieve something – don’t you have any ambitions? Try to learn something new. Maybe volunteer in a charity shop – I used to do that and loved it. It helped give me self respect, made me feel like I was doing something worthwhile, let me talk briefly with customers, and it forced me out of bed in the morning.
Concentrate on your own life and maybe find friends…I’ve just broken up with someone and don’t know if she really cared…so I’m going to try to make some genuine friends, and I spend time with my mum and dog when I see them…
Take care x
just doit already
go to the next world.its nice there
u will be reincarnated as a mouse
squeek squeek
get a backbone lad.u can be happy on ur own.just ask robinson crusoe.he liked it and so do i.
I hope ur okay dude. You dont deserve what happened to you. And don’t kill yourself, because someone out there loves you. And, if you don’t believe me, I love you.
hey, just stumbled across this page, and I just wanna tell ya, I’ve done the whole suicide thing, and made it out the other side.
No one is ever worth you thinking you should not be here anymore. You sound so decent and kind, and her, well , she will burn in hell. (sorry I was trying not to swear there).
Please take all the help available to you, talk to people, even if you can only do that online, or friends, family, I know it will seem hard but as soon as you start you will feel the benefits.
Take each day as it comes, and you WILL get over all this.
xxxxx
It’s an interesting thing to note – I already said this on another thread – but if women think that being a woman is hard; they should try being a good man. Most good women ask ‘where are all the good men?!’. The honest answer is that, just as good women are targeted by bad men, so too good men are targeted by bad women. Trust me on this: the damage an unscrupulous woman can do to a man she sees as ‘a weakling’ is beyond imagining.
As for ‘suicide’: I’m only sorry that the only thing I can offer you is solidarity. There really are women out there that deserve a man like you – and yes, I mean good women, ie. women with souls.
If there is a God, or Karma, or Tao or whatever… then she really has earned herself a one way ticket to the land of eternal sunburn. Soulless demons belong in Hell after all.
I say stay in your room for as long as it takes.
If you can get away with that then stay in your room until you feel powerful enough to leave the house with out getting hurt. The kind of devotion you offered to that girl like buying gifts etc, might be better suited to idol worship.
Unfortunately girls brains are not equipped to understand such concepts as honor and pure love hence the smaller brain size. It’s not really a girls fault she kind of has to be mean to protect herself. But once you understand the concept that when girls test you all you have to do is tease them back constantly or ignore them and stay strong it will help you cope.
Nice guy behavior only translates as being clingy and needy in a girls mind I know it feels so right to treat girls and everyone with total love but you wont get girls very attracted in doing so.
Have a look around on the internet for some great funny routines and inner help to solve dating problems I personally am dating two woman. I have no car, no job yet I’m still unsatisfied with the concept that I cant always be myself and never show my true feelings with either with them. I have never met a girl who treats a man right maybe in the 1800s. If I ever meet such a girl I might change my beliefs about them.
Don’t believe the rubbish ambiguity that you will met a nice girl, they are all the same and respond to nonsense jokes like a moth to a flame.
Unless you move to Iraq you are going to have to play them for what they are I know this probably doesn’t help get her back but it might.
@nightwish.
Females have smaller brain mass and size. The kicker is, we have the SAME number of brain cells. The extra mass, does not come from extra “brainpower”, but from additional tissue in the male brain intended to protect it, while fighting. That’s why men have thicker skulls.
Nice try though. It’s amazing what people can convince themselves of with a bit of pop-science.
The rest of your post…sigh. Women are confusing you. Here’s a recommendation. Stop trying to date them, stop trying to have sex with them. Just get to KNOW women. Make a choice to be celibate for a while, regardless of what a woman offers. Just be nice, get to know us. You will begin to appreciate us a little better.
I recommend the same thing to women, that hate men. Stop, trying to GET them so you can feel good, and start liking them
HEY MAN YOU SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOURSELF! ONE LESS MAN IN THE WORLD. You know I have heard sob stories like that before from men claiming to be so hard done by women, then when you hear the woman’s side you realise these men were abusers of women as well as liars. GO KILL YOURSELF! Heaven knows death is nothing compared with having to live with PTSD due to being abused by an asshole male. You cunts kill our souls and that is criminal!
Just expressing my input…
Well, honestly from my point of view Suicidal reminds me my last boyfriend…
I WAS a nice girl the best girl he could ever have met, (his words), he felt peace with me, felt at ease, light, harmonious and good in our relationship- his words again. I call him the cry baby jerk, cause he cried due to his sensitivity (pretense sensitivity). He also shared with me his pain towards the last cheating ex, the mother who died, the father that couldn’t care less… blá, blá…
So a week after we got to be intimate (after a long period of dating without it) he calls me on the phone… on-the-phone, to tell me he slept with another girl he talked on MSN, and he was going to stay with her. That she made him fell anxious, nervous, unstable, stressed out, but he still prefered to be with her* quite the opposite of what he felt with me, the serene, blissful, loving peace of our relationship*…- his words again.
I didn’t do drama, I said OK. If he changed his mind let me know.
So a month later he calls me to talk, and tells me that she, the new girlfriend, was pregnant from other guy and he made a mistake, she was a b*tch *, she was goig to stay with the other guy and he wanted back with me….
I just wanted to laugh really loud…. *
So sorry Suicidal I can’t feel sorry for you at all! You remind me of him… cause he really seemed such a nice guy***, who bought me stuff, gave me flowers (and got thanks for it, sometimes a flower back), who listened, who seemed to care, who could wait until I was ready, so sensitive, complaining how at school the girls seemed to preffer all the bad guys over him***… Poor him!
But he didn’t cared for me when it came the time to cheat… and oh I had shared with him the previous misdoing of my other ex’s and the pain they caused me… and he seemed so understanding, promissing he would never do such thing to me…. he even cried cause I didn’t let him kiss me on the first date and he said that it wasn’t fair that because the of the other guys he should be denied a chance from me- I only had denied the kiss, and wanted us to take time to meet first!
Now… I didn’t killed myself for any of the stupid jerks I’ve met and they were many. Not even most of the other women who meet jerks 99,99999% of the time, have killed themselves, for the ninetuple of the pain you think you are feeling they’ve endured! You meet one girl, one…, and think of killing yourself????
I think you just want attention! I don’t feel any sorry for your pain!* Sorry! What makes you better than all the other women that you should find love at the first girl you think you love?
Even because it was that particular girl* that made you do, feel that! I wonder if it would be the same for you if she was different!
Going celibate for whatever amount of time doesn’t work either…. a jerk is always a jerk , our small (female) brain is slow to get it, that’s why the heart suffers! That’s why I’ve been men free for more than a year and still going, my love for them is decreasing, they are still jerks. Some pop-scientist said that love is only a drug on the brain… “Try to go the women’s Rehab, I say: Go! Go! Go!”
It’s amazing that guys should expect to hit the jackpoot in love at first, and if they don’t they kill themselves. While women “are supposed” to hit the jackpoot like at the millionth try or never, and live with it… and still be called the weaker sex!
I don’t think you should die unless you really want to for yourself ,not for her- cause that’s the dumbest thing, it means your brain is a dwarf peanut to your age. I respect dying to save someone’s life, but for being rejected???By someone who doesn’t give a shit for you? And why is that?* Try someone nice next time, and then if you still want, go kill yourself, but not before homework and I suggest you give your heart, kidneys, as a transplant for someone who really needs one to live, before killing yourself, there are many waiting in lines at the hospitals and at least you would have done something really usefull with your death!Those people aren’t taking life for granteed..
I think you want to pity yourself, and killing yourself won’t make her feel guilty! I think you should grow with the experience, get some balls! And proove me wrong!
*So it is true… they do preffer bitches… and that was a GUY that told me and prove to me!
*** Girls do like nice guys until they realize they don’t actually exist!
Suicide is a choice–one is where you run away from your problems and the other is where you tackle them on despite the consequences and impediments.
Which one do you think is more valued?
Make the right decision.
What man keeps a diary? SOMETHING’S FISHY HERE.
please don't kill yourself. its not worth killing yourself over what one person did to you. I'm sure things seem hopeless right now, and I can't really fully understand, but please please look at the full picture. 1 person out of 6 billion fucked you up. there's so many more people you can still meet and grow yourself with. please don't die.