Do I hate men? I ask myself that everyday, every time I encounter one of the male species. Married women, I hate. I just have an automatic vendetta to “happily” married women. I can’t explain it.

I act myself all the time. I am considered cool and awesome with the Guys, but they still end up marrying absolutely stupid, air-headed women. Because I can use my brain for more than how to make a gingerbread house, I am forced to sit on the curb, Single.
Guys claim it’s me. I have an anger issue. Excuses! I do have a blazing temper, but it’s not a quick temper. And I never assume or blame until I know everyone’s side of the story. That’s how I am. Simple, but to the point. Truth is my goal at all times.
Or it’s I’m too guy-ish? SAY What? Tomboy, yes I am. Always have been. I don’t dress like a guy tho. I walk and dress like a woman, but I am not LIKE a woman because I AM a WOMAN. When I speak, sometimes I sound like a sailor who hasn’t been laid in a few months cause he’s been to sea, but not all the time. So what? I can play sports better than a lot of men. I can lay down the Law and enforce it with more power than most men too. SO?

I am who I am. I grew up the way I felt comfortable. Hey, so I’m a little rough around the edges. Abrasive and blunt, but HONEST and LOYAL as all get out. I try not to let others down and always be there, but sometimes I can’t even help losing my grip or falling down. Men don’t want that slip tho. They want Miss Perfect Cheerleader Barbie. Who by the way is very fake in every way possible. Me? I’m Ms. Kick-Your-Ass, Make-It-Count All American White Girl! Big difference apparently.

I also have a good ass job. I am not completely successful like I want to be, but I work hard to play harder and If I don’t work hard enough then I don’t play at all. I do not look for a man who makes more than me. Money has only been a chain that keeps people from doing what they want. I ignore it when I can. Looks are not always a thing with me either. I wish for a man who has enough respect to care for himself, then I know he’ll take care of me. But what get’s my goat sooo much is it is so easy for them to just walk away even after all that you have both given to each other… or so it would seem.

So what did I do once I learned that men don’t stick around when it gets to be too much for them? I trapped my battered and broken heart within a brick wall. I replaced Love with Lust a.k.a. Sex. I control the settings of how I meet my boy toys, but I’m not dominant or controlling towards them. I just control the How-It-Goes so I don’t end up trapped in an attachment I don’t want. I figure that’s how they think so why not think like them? I don’t expect any man to even pay attention to me. I know I’m attractive and I know what I got, but given the track record of the guys I’ve even been friends with I don’t expect anything more than getting laid.

A strong will to live happy as a loner is better then living in misery with a man who is never loyal. But any man willing to go the extra mile with me earns my respect tho love is not really an option right now. I just don’t believe this “Man” exists. It’s just not in their nature to do so. So I avoid hope in that area.

Everyone is Welcome to my world as it unravels…

This post was submitted by Annastasia.