Well now that I know this is not just a place for only women to post (nice to be inclusive in discussions :D), I will post my thoughts.
I believe there’s a lot of sexism on this board. You might not see it but it’s just like ageism, racism, or any other ism. To judge people on a stereotype. The second you take one experience and apply it to everyone of that feature (in this case, mostly males) then you have effectively given into stereotyping others.
I get that there have been men that wronged some of you, but is it worth putting that stereotype in place to all men?
I have a friend here who went back to Ireland to visit his mother while she was dying.. While he was away for 2 weeks, his girlfriend goes and cheats on him with her ex and two other guys in that 14 day time span. Should he put that stereotype to all women and just treat the like every single woman sleeps around with multiple guys any chance they get?
No, because that wouldn’t be fair to others. We are all human beings and we are all unique with our own unique set of needs and wants in life. Some men and some women just aren’t the right match for each of us. But perhaps to someone else they are the right match. So we should not judge everyone because one person does not meet our needs and wants.
This whole misogyny and misandry thing forms from a cycle. A woman/man gets a bad impression on the opposite gender due to their experiences and begins to believe they must be like them to fix it. So they act like that toward someone who didn’t have any part of the sexist cycle and now they believe all people of that gender are like that, so they will continue it and it never ends for anybody.
What I am trying to get at, in layman’s terms here, is that there are both good and bad women and men. We have many bad experiences with a few, then we begin to change ourselves and become what we despised towards someone that is still alright until they have dealt with us.
I could keep going on and on. But let me end this with one of my own personal experiences with a woman.
Her and I were having a long distance online relationship, I usually don’t do that, but she only lived one province away. So 14 months into this, I buy a $120 bus ticket to travel over 500km’s for over 5 hours to see her on Valentine’s Day. When I got to the bus stop however, she was no where to be seen. So thinking she slept in/a little late, I wait there for two hours. Now feeling a bit nervous, I get catch a ride with a stranger to the local army base there to see if anyone knew her or could contact her to let her know I’m here. No luck, so I get a ride with another stranger to a local hotel and luckily I had just $10 more than what I needed to rent a room there for the night. Because the bus to go home was not coming again for at least another day and there was still a little hope left.. She decided to spur my hope one more time by saying she was coming to the hotel to take me back to her place so I wouldn’t be stuck there for the storm the next day. She kept that hope running for another hour before she crushed it completely saying the whole thing was a joke to her. $250 in costs between bus and hotel, me running down 32 stories of stairs because elevators were broke in my apartment while lugging 100lbs of luggage down them + another 3 hours of lugging them out there when I got there, the fact that if I did not have cash in my pocket for a hotel I’d be stuck out in the cold snow, or the fact that my parents could have easily gotten into a car accident due to coming out to get me before the storm hit (and before the next night that I WOULD have been stuck out in the cold due to not enough money for a second night), none of that meant a thing to her. Everything was a joke and if anything happened to me or my parents it’d be my fault supposedly.
I could take that plus other bad experiences with women and just apply them to women in general. But the thing is, I can separate the fact that everyone is different and the actions of a few do not reflect what everyone is.
So yes, some of you have had bad experiences with men, but just remember there are men out there who have had equally bad experiences with women. It does not make an excuse for us to be sexist towards each other.
Take my experience, my friend’s experience, even your own experience and think about it. The thing they have in common is good people getting caught up with a jackass that has plainly screwed us over for their own enjoyment. Don’t become them. Don’t treat people poorly because of our experiences as people. Because you might then unknowingly create another jerk due to just adding one more notch in their list of bad experiences with people.
This post was submitted by Sinsun1.